Saturday, December 27, 2008

I have had a very inspiring Christmas. Very thought provoking and very blessed. On Monday the 22nd, we learned that our neighbor's (across the street) son was killed in a horrible car accident in Provo Canyon. He was 18, a senior in school. He and his friends were headed up the canyon to go snowboarding. The driver also passed away.
Kirk and I headed over on Monday evening with a couple of loaves of warm bread (why is it that we think food can fix things?) and to see what we could do to help. Four of their beautiful daughters were quick with hugs and to take the bread to the kitchen. Katrina and Dave, the parents, were absolutely inspirational. We held each other for a time. Whispered love and sympathy in their ears and then listened as they described the accident, going to the hospital, learning of Neal not surviving and then spoke so reverently of the blessing they had of holding him in their arms and saying their goodbyes.
Each day, through this week, I have continually thought of this family. As I filled stockings and wrapped presents, I wondered how they were holding up. Kirk inspired deeper reflection, "How do you fill Christmas stockings and plan a funeral?" As I planned food for festivities I wondered about the change this will make for them, for their family and the holiday.
When I was 10 my great-grandmother, Elizabeth Westoby Fry, passed away on Christmas Eve. I remember thinking, Christmas will never be the same again. I was wrong. I think about her every Christmas Eve. I think about sleepovers in her apartment in Provo. I think about going to the mall with her on the bus. What a sweet lady and what wonderful memories for such a short amount of time in my life that I got to spend with her.
Neals' funeral was yesterday. I have never seen a Stake Center so incredibly full, all the way to the stage in the cultural hall behind the chapel. Camille, the second oldest daughter talked about fun family memories of Neal. Dave, his dad, spoke of him as a son, brother and child of God. Our Bishop gave the most amazing eternal perspective talk that I think I have ever heard. But the thing that really resonated in my heart was a song that was sung by the three younger sisters with a children's choir. The song is called, Bend The Knee. I have searched for quite some time this morning trying to find the lyrics, without success. If anyone knows them, please pass them on to me.
This family is amazing and inspiring. As mourners came to mourn with them, they lifted us up. They taught of grace and hope and faith. I know that all will be well with them. They are the type of family that makes the best of every situation. Please keep them in your prayers.

4 comments:

Dani said...

Glad to hear it went well yesterday, They have been in our prayers! Love you Mom!

Chris said...

I can't even begin to imagine the pain they must be feeling. It always amazes me of how people going through such trials are the ones who end up lifting you. I'm sure you were a great help to them like you always are.

Kayleen and Kay Sheppard said...

A death of any family member near or on a holiday always is hard to bear. I too, annually get sad on christmas eve day, missing Grandma Fry, my mom who already passed, and my kids living so far away. But, I need to remind myself, at this time, of all the great memories I have of them all. Lately I have relied on these memories to get me through tough times. I only know I am blessed unceasingly with a memory of them. I hope your family is well and had a great holiday. Good luck in the new year, 2009, and may it bring you more joy and happiness ever found in past years. Love, Aunt Neen

Shana said...

I heard about that accident. So sorry to hear it was your neighbor! That would be such a hard thing to bare, especially at this time of year! I hope that their family has peace in their hearts, which I am sure they do. I am glad they have you as a neighbor!!