Saturday, August 23, 2008

What a Boost of Encouragement!

I just spent the last few days at BYU Education Week and I can't tell you how many times I thought, "I have got to tell _____ about that!" (you all can fill in the blank with your name!)
This was the first year I have attended but it has been going on since 1971. Over 200 presenters and more than 1000 classes on everything from finances to food storage are available throughout the week. Because of my work schedule I wasn't able to attend the whole time, but I crammed in as much as I could when I wasn't at work.
I don't want to bore some of you light weighted brainiacs with a looooong post (sorry Tui) so I will just share a little at a time.
One of the best classes I went to was "Choosing to be Happily Married" taught by lifecoach Connie Sokol. The title of the class itself is something I wish more people would think about. The actual class itself...amazing! I was so inspired by the way she taught, the way she brought so much of it back to scripture and the way she added a little humor to some not-so-humorous situations.
One of the greatest things she taught was VAC. These are things to remember when conversing with someone.
VAC: Validate, Ask Questions, Closure.

Validate the person you are speaking with by really listening to what they are saying and vocally respond to the situation. Let's say your hubby came home and said, "Honey, I lost my job today." Instead of freaking out and saying..."How are we going to pay the bills? What did you do to make this happen? Or many other like-minded phrases, try this: "I am so sorry hon. Tell me what happened."

Ask questions about the situation: "What did you say after that?" or "Wow. How did you react?"

Closure. End the conversation on the most positive note you can. "I am sorry that happened, but I am sure everything will work out."

It is okay to say everything will work out BECAUSE IT WILL! Remember, in the scriptures it said.... "And it came to pass" NOT "And it came to stay".

She also shared quotes from a lot of books that she has gleaned info on. Here are a few:

The Surrendered Wife.....
Laura Doyle
I Don't Have To Make Everything All Better...Gary Lundberg and Joy Lundberg
Gifts From The Sea....
Anne Morrow Lindbergh

I have read the book by the Lundberg's, but it was a wonderful reminder. If I recall correctly, the VAC info was something they taught. I am looking forward to reading the others.
Let me know if any of you have read these or are planning on it. It would open up a wonderful discussion!

3 comments:

Shana said...

Hi Gena, this is Shana. That is so neat you were able to attend and that class sounds like a good one!! I have been able to go one time and I loved it!! It is so neat and they give you so many great topics to choose from, it is really hard to choose!! That sounds like a great one to pick!!
I love your cute blog! If you want to see mine, you can email me at shanapyne4@Yahoo.com and I can invite you to see it. Love ya!

Chris said...

I haven't been to education week for years and years. I've been once or twice and swore I'd go back but because of work I never have. I"m glad you enjoyed it. There's so much to learn in such a short time. Love ya~~

Kayleen and Kay Sheppard said...

YOU HAVE IT ALL TOGETHER GIRL....I JUST HOPE I CAN PUT ALL THIS TO PRACTICE! Come see me soon, or we'll do lunch; you can tell me more! Love ya, Aunt Neen